The Kalem Society

TRANSCRIPT

GEIST: ...by the metaphysics of whatever weird-ass, backwards dimension you come from, human - but here - things aren't so black and white.

LAMAR: You look pretty black and white to me.

GEIST: In anycase, you're perverse.

LAMAR: Perverse! I'm perverse? You're a bloodsucking monster!

GEIST: Yes, you derive a perverse pleasure from killing the undead - even these zombies, who are basically innocent.

LAMAR: Innocent!?! They're zombies!

GEIST: Zombies are people too.

LAMAR: Then why are you killing them?

GEIST: Okay, I retract that statement. Vampires are people. Humans are sheep. But zombies are to vampires what apes are to humans - which puts zombies about on par with humans, in the sense that one should avoid killing them unless it's absolutely necessary. (pause) ...or expedient. (pause) ...or if they look at you funny.

GEIST: These zombies are uppity. They serve a mortal master and that's unnatural - the dead shouldn't serve the living. There's a nice cluster incoming from the south - by the way.

LAMAR: I see'em, I see'em...

ZOMBIE #1: Uhng... Kill.

ZOMBIE #2: Uhng... Yes, kill.

ZOMBIE #3: Kill for the master.

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